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Love and grief are not opposing forces. They are strands of the same thread. Terrible things happen everyday. Traumatic losses are happening all the time. It's the deepest parts of our very soul that allow us to feel our way through grief just as much as it allow us to feel deeply in love.
Don't close yourself around loss. Move slowly forward and live. These are the experiences that mark us and allow us to fully understand the power of connection.
Someone said to me the other day, "Forget and move on."
When someone has a joyful experience like the birth of a child or wins some amazing prize we don't say, "Nice, now forget that and move on." So why when someone you love dies do people feel obligated to remind you it's something you need to move on from?
We have to remember grief is a tough emotion to sit with. Grief is like falling in love - you don't "get it" until you feel it - like deeply in your body that you can't really find words for. This isn't just a moment in time, it's an indelible mark that can't be fixed, erased, or forgotten. You can have grief and love and laugh again - even in the same ten minutes, we just keep moving forward. But we don't "move on" and I think that's just how the human experience works.
What do you think? Move forward, or move on?